A Mole's Never Ending Hole
by LadyPorpoise
Summary: During the night, Glorfindel is met by Maeglin in the fields. The Mole-Lord wants to give the Golden-Flower something-a gesture of gratitude, but Glorfindel sees and senses the complete anguish the son of Eol is enduring. If only Maeglin would share what ailed him so. Alas, the king's nephew must go through with his treachery, even if he does it unwillingly, he is caving in...


_A/N I have my big normal Silmarillion canon ideas/thoughts at the bottom because it'd be too long up here, and you want to read the story. Any weird thing that pops up in story will be explained below, as much as I can while using ideas and writings Tolkien either scrapped, edited, and is in the published Silmarillion and other essays. My writing style I purposely tried to be more sophisticated with, or improve my sentence structure so I'm not using the same sentence-style and "was" all the time._

_No slash...Just good old best friends and a mentor/pupil possibly father/son kind of relationships._

* * *

Gondolin at night would always be beautiful. At all hours of the day and night, it was fair, but at night it was special. For Glorfindel, for all the once-dwellers of Aman, the night held a special place in their hearts. With Gondolin inspired by Tirion, all that was missing were the two Trees shining through the Calacirya. The two trees in the courtyard did not come close to replicating Laurelin and Telperion's glory. Such memories Glorfindel reflected on with mourning, though his cheerful attitude toward everything that was not evil drowned the melancholy away. The lord of the Golden Flower roamed the streets. Lighters lit the Noldorin lamps; shining off a pale blue glow and glimmered against the white stones. Happily, they greeted Glorfindel, and in turn, he greeted them with warmth and left them laughing.

The wanderings of Glorfindel led him outside of the city. Why exactly, the elf did not know. He had half a mind to go to the Seven Gates to annoy Ecthelion, especially after the fountain-lord cut off half his fellow lord's hair as a statement. The golden-flower must stop hiding and get back to work, seeing that his aim to find a wife by letting his already glorious locks grow even longer failed dramatically.

That or Glorfindel wanted to appreciate the green fields and flowers during the night.

Regardless of the motive, the elf trod down the road leading to the Orfalch Echor, straying from the path every now and then.

Far from both the city and the mountain pass was when Glorfindel thought something was off. He turned back and found nothing, but upon facing his original direction, Maeglin suddenly appeared in that span of time.

Maeglin said nothing, staring at Glorfindel with those unnervingly penetrating eyes. Being named sharp glance was an understatement. Fortunately for Glorfindel, the prince used to be his pupil, so the effect was not as intense. But Maeglin's strange behavior recently-happiness that was out of character, borderline manic even, his intensified isolation, and wearing the Galvorn of his father presently made Glorfindel wary.

"Good evening, Lómion," he said kindly enough.

"I have been looking for you," Maeglin answered shortly and without elaborating.

The lack of detail did not surprise the golden-lord. Glorfindel smiled anyway. "Oh? I am honored to be of aid to my prince. Who knows what great things could be achieved with my wit and your skilled hands? What project do you wish to-"

"Your annoying flamboyance with words never ceases to amuse me," Maeglin interrupted drably with the most unamused face.

Glorfindel took the interruption in stride. He laughed good-naturedly. "I can tell, yet that is my most endearing trait, so I am told. I know it has made you smile before, child, even if that meant being locked in your closet to make it happen."

A reminder of that event made Maeglin's features soften, if barely, which made Glorfindel frown somewhat. The elf-lord did not expect to see the flash of dejected, defeated sadness in the younger elf's eyes-anguish, before it dissipated immensely. Glorfindel expected a better response, what with the strange happiness Maeglin expressed everywhere else.

"I…have something, to show you," the pale one said quietly, quickly turning into that socially awkward and timid child the prince used to be first coming to Gondolin. Glorfindel forced himself to recall that Maeglin was not even two hundred years old yet, and his less than ideal circumstances early in life. "A gift if you want to call it that."

Glorfindel was surprised, but he kept it contained. Maeglin reacted better to quiet and gentleness in this mood, which meant saying nothing to this.

Maeglin studied the other's face for either acceptance or rejection. He saw waiting to be shown what the gift was, and the son of Eöl turned and walked off the path. Glorfindel followed.

More and more questions began to form in Glorfindel's mind, the longer they walked. They were headed toward the Crissaegrim, away from both the known passes, which did not help his current unease. The ideas and questions that were being thought of made Glorfindel feel greater concern, alongside frustration.

'Little one, what have you been up to that only brings detriment and infamy to yourself this time?' he wondered

Maeglin showed him a narrow passage into the mountains, near a waterfall, but Glorfindel made no approach. "We must go through here."

"Lómion, tell me you have not gone outside again unauthorized." Glorfindel pleaded.

Maeglin blinked and blankly stared after turning his head. It was all the affirmation the golden-elf needed.

"Why do you continue to disobey the king? You know very well if I were someone else, you would have been dead three times over." Glorfindel started in a firm voice. "I do not spread this information around, but the general public already thinks you are up to no good. It is as if you do not stop causing mischief. They may start telling Turukáno to flog you again or toss you into the Caragdûr."

Maeglin's posture tensed and his eyes narrowed, a dark frown crossing his features while Glorfindel spoke. Beneath his inky cloak, he made a fist.

"I fear for you, child." Glorfindel eased up on the vehemence. "There is only so much I can do for you, neither can I be responsible for you like before: before you reached your full maturity. Your recent behavior is abnormal. It disturbs me that the king is not noticing the obvious suffering you are enduring, but I half wonder if you bring it on yourself with your deeds. Why do you bring harm to yourself?"

Maeglin moved too fast for Glorfindel to register. Maeglin annoyingly was cunning during sparring, using tricks only learned by spending time in Nan Elmoth. The younger elf grabbed the front of Glorfindel's clothes, getting dangerously close. Vicious anger, frustration, and _grief_ were all over Eölion's face. Again, Glorfindel felt shocked and a little afraid, but he kept a calm and sturdy appearance.

"I do not see you, the great magnificent Laurefindil, having to deal with looks of disgust or slanderous words for being a half-breed, half-blood you are indeed being Noldo and Vanya. Alas, I am cursed with the blood of the Avari, so claimed to be the originators of the Orcs according to Elwë in his forest." Maeglin hissed. "Dark elf, the silent, wispy ghost living among the most pompous and self-righteous group of elves in Beleriand, isolated away from their brethren's war; a war which the king shamefully hides away from. It caused the death of his father. If only he came out, then maybe Ñolofinwë would be alive.

Every day I struggle to bring the best for my people-such a compliment that his majesty would appoint his TRUE heir to be lord of the slums, lord of the ugly and less fair of our race-against the noble and more wealthy houses that look down on us. So many verbal beatings have I endured for the sake of my people-my children, so much sacrifice given so that they could enjoy the simple life the king and the rest of the Eldar think they deserve."

Glorfindel dealt with such outbursts before, though this time he floundered. "I know about-"

"Do not interrupt me," Maeglin growled before smiling oddly. "You _know_ about it, but you do _nothing_ to help the situation. You may have stood by me at my trial to prove my innocence before everyone that I do not lust after my cousin, comforted me after being given one hundred lashes since the king does not have the courage to kill off what is left of his sister," the pale one choked a bit at the thought of Aredhel. "Been one of my only friends in this forsaken and naïve place…But you do _nothing_ to make lasting change."

Glorfindel's heart swelled with pity and sorrow but dared not speak yet.

"But it does not matter." Maeglin conceded, defeated. "Does not matter. While Gondolin is hidden away from all the evil outside, people will be bored and need _something_ to entertain themselves. I will always be the target of their amusements. No matter what I do, it will be construed to something evil and disgusting. I could marry one of the ladies of the Mole and be accused of being unfaithful to my wife…"

Maeglin trailed off. He then pushed Glorfindel away.

"So do not wonder why I leave the confines of the mountains so often, ignoring the risk of punishment it would bring. The Gondolindhrim have set their minds to write me as the most abhorrent being to walk this earth in history, so why should I fight to change it, after nearly two centuries of trying?"

Glorfindel watched Maeglin pace and fidget, and an air of darkness, a foreign presence even (but he put that thought away immediately), surrounded the son of Eöl. Silently Glorfindel took a moment to come up with an answer. "If you give up, then it will only reinforce the ideas everyone has about you. But do not think yourself innocent, Lómion, for you are not. Your strong public opposition to Tuor marrying Idril makes them think you desire the princess still, no matter what your thoughts are that you think she deserves better. You use the tricks of Nan Elmoth for your own amusement or to teach someone a lesson you think they need to be taught. And the recent council with the king: why complain of his rule of being away from the troubles of the world, only to tell him to focus on acquiring more wealth and reinforce his pride in the kingdom? I will not deny that I detect deviance in you for the blatant manipulation at the table."

Maeglin seemed to freeze at the accusation.

But Glorfindel…dear Glorfindel, always wanted to give people benefit of the doubt, wanted to help. And this was someone whom he could claim to be a son, perhaps more so than Turgon, given Glorfindel was less naïve and air-headed compared to the elf-king, so Glorfindel felt obliged to give that extra leeway.

Not including how the golden-lord felt like he failed his pupil in various ways…

"Child, you are afraid. You know you can confide to me if your uncle is not an option. What is weighing down your soul so much?"

Maeglin shook his head.

Glorfindel took a step forward.

"Do not," Maeglin pleaded. "Please…leave it alone…You cannot do anything."

Glorfindel huffed. "You said I do not make any lasting change, well, now I am trying to do that, and you reject it. What do you want from me?"

Maeglin's mouth opened and closed, his usually quick and intelligent words halted.

"What can I do to help?" Glorfindel pressed.

"Let it go," Maeglin caved in with a sound of the desperation of wanting to get off the topic. "Let _me_ go…As you said, I am not your responsibility anymore…Just…Let me show my gratitude to you, with what is beyond this passage."

Glorfindel felt defeated and disappointed. Again, the golden-lord walked forward, closing the distance between the two. He pulled Maeglin into a brotherly hug. The younger one tried to resist at first, but both were too keenly aware of Maeglin's maddening desire for physical contact, so in the end, Maeglin held on for dear life.

"I am deeply sorry that we have failed you so much, little one," Glorfindel said softly. "I am sorry that I failed you so."

Maeglin pulled away, withdrawn and hunched over. "Go forth," he whispered. He quickly disappeared from the mountainside into the darkness of night.

Glorfindel watched as long as he could before gazing into the mountain pass. His honor and integrity to Turgon came to the surface if he should move forward. Only Maeglin knew the location of the gift and how far into the mountains it was. But he could not step away now, not after tonight's discussion. Glorfindel would not brush Maeglin off, even if Maeglin did that to him. The child deserved some acknowledgement and kindness…

Glorfindel entered the pass, climbing up the slope, made it to an outcropping next to the water before re-entering the mountains again. He stopped somewhere along the way, feeling more than one presence before him.

He was not at all prepared for what he saw.

The elf beheld Laiquendi coming, three: two women and a man. But there was a fourth behind them.

"Erestor!" Glorfindel shouted with joy.

"It has been a while, old friend," aforementioned elf greeted with a smile and came forward. Erestor should have seen it coming when Glorfindel bearhugged him, expelling all breath from his lungs and nigh crushing ribs. "Glor-!"

"Mellon, my soul rejoices to be in your company once again after so many years. Do you still have the gold leaf I made you?"

"He does," one of the women answered. "Please let him breathe."

Glorfindel "oh"d and let his green-elf go. Erestor inhaled and exhaled and half glared, but it had light in that glance. "How…How did you find-" The lord of the golden flower's racing brain settled down long enough to come to the realization.

"Maeglin came by the northern borders of Brethil," Erestor explained. The green-elf frowned. "I will tell you why we were there later…but he pleaded that he show us the Hidden City from afar, and away from the main entryway where we would have been caught and interrogated."

Glorfindel was speechless. Maeglin-was it by chance, or deliberate? Why would the lord of the Mole do this? Maeglin did say this was an expression of gratitude…

Stars, this was more than Glorfindel could have asked for.

"You must see Gondolin, all of you," he voiced. "Even from afar, then you may be able to see what Tirion is like in Aman, if remotely. Or better create the image in your minds from what I said to you before."

Conversation burst into a cheerful and innocent wonder of the Hidden City. Glorfindel and Erestor related many accounts of what happened in their lives over the years, enjoying immensely being in each other's company once more. When they came to the outcrop, Glorfindel was delighted seeing the green-elves' awed amazement of the city built on the hill in Tumladen. The longer he watched, the more greatful the golden-lord felt toward his once-pupil.

'I will find a way to repay you, Lómion…I swear it.'

Unbeknownst to him at the time…Glorfindel never had the chance to repay the debt before Gondolin was encroached in flame.

* * *

Maeglin came swiftly to his mansion inside the city, evading even the most trusted of his followers and supporters. They knew of the plan, or what little of the twisted version Maeglin deigned to reveal to them. It was enough to earn their sword-arm for when…the time came. He did not even change into the white robes he was known to wear. All he ever wore was white in memory of Aredhel, save for the black Galvorn for hunting and for war.

He went to the garden and curled up into a tight ball after finding a mole to hold in his hand for comfort. The soft if ugly creature gave little support against the consuming black hole in his soul, making him gasp and bite his free wrist to muffle the scream of despair.

The brand in his shoulder burned and pulsed.

'How sweet of you to give such a nice gesture to your friend,' the demon lieutenant purred in Maeglin's mind. 'I am sure the master would be delighted to have you fight him. He would only cause problems for your reign if he were alive.'

'Shut up!' Maeglin yelled mentally in response, feeling too many conflicting and warring emotions and thoughts. Some were his own…some, were not.

The only thing that resonated with his fëa and sounded reasonable to his mind was how the Gondolindhrim _deserved_ to get their life of peace disturbed. The peace made them arrogant, ignorant of the outside world, of reality. It would humble them. Make them feel what he and his people felt. Make it fair. As for being king: Maeglin rejected that offer when he was in the presence of Morgoth, but over time, it slowly became more appealing to him. As king, he could fix the issues that Turgon allowed to manifest in his kingdom.

No matter how much the demon inside wanted him to feel it, Maeglin never once felt desire for his cousin. Regardless…for her inaction too, and hate for Tuor, he would kill the man himself, and let his cousin to the mercy of Morgoth.

None of it felt satisfying.

And Glorfindel was right…He was always right. Maeglin was not innocent, he did things he should not have for his own amusement or to get back at society. And yes, he _did_ manipulate Turgon. Manipulated him, has been, _is_ shaping the king to be weakened and less ready to face the onslaught to come. Maeglin even apologized to Turgon before, soon after returning from the pains of Angband, but never stated why he suffered so. Now, as time went on…the guilt lessened, and his disappointment and anger toward his uncle festered.

All Maeglin felt was as if he had sworn an Oath as bad as Fëanor's: irredeemable. Irredeemable, compounded with utter abandonment and despair…

* * *

**_"Then Meglin was bidden fare home lest at his absence men suspect somewhat; but Melko wove about him the spell of bottomless dread, and he had thereafter neither joy nor quiet in his heart. Nonetheless he wore a fair mask of good liking and gaiety…he went no more quarrying stone or ore in the hills: yet in sooth he sought herein to drown his fear and disquiet." – Fall of Gondolin pg 68._**

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_A/N __Strangely enough...Maeglin I consider to be a favorite character, in my super convoluted way that he is not incestous, and was heavily biased against in the history books since I think Gondolin (or Turgon at least later on) got really really arrogant and snobbish in their isolation. I feel a bit supported in that after getting my hands on the Fall of Gondolin...I mean...The house of the Mole literally sounds like the slums of Gondolin. I don't think Maeglin would feel very happy being the crown-prince after Aredhel and Eol died, Turgon gives him the people who are "ugly" in elf standards to be in charge over, Idril marries and has Earendil and gets the crown-prince title taken away...Gets called an Orc..._

_A mini rebellion in the hearts of the Mole-elves got kickstarted by Morgoth after he got his dirty paws on Maeglin. o.o_

_On the orc thing, and I got told this was a scrapped idea, but I like the idea of Eol being an Avar more than a Sinda, because of the whole "Orcs came from Avari" theory by Thingol truly, so that could lead to some bad things happening to poor half-Noldo/Avar Maeglin. So he's that._

_Maeglin...I am thinking because of how isolated he was in Nan Elmoth, his social skills were completely thrown awry. The servants of Eol were said to be silent, so all Maeglin could have for conversation is with Aredhel, Eol, and the rare dwarf visits. So all he knows socially is probably dwarf culture, which may be a bit more rowdy than elves, and his more clingy nature made him seem really off putting in the eyes of the Gondolindhrim. Compound that he became an orphan at the age of 80...So maybe his attempts to be nice to his cousin came more off as trying to be flirty-he just didn't know any better. Yes, I understand that historically some royalty tried to keep the bloodline "pure" with very close marriages, but given the Laws and Customs say no marriage between first cousins, I would consider it to be a crime among elves, especially if it has a more lusty sort of pursuing (Eol was written to have raped Aredhel for pete's sake at first...), hence a reference to a trial in Gondolin which I may write. I also acknowledge that Tolkien had various ideas going on, and I'm just plopping what I like into something I hope that is sensible._

_What's up with Glorfindel? Well, mainly inspired by the fact my sister and I think Chris Hemsworth would be a good Glorfindel and Tom Hiddleston as Maeglin/Eol, so now I can't help but think of Glorfindel and Maeglin's relationship to be like Thor and Loki, or the very least Mentor/Pupil. Besides, Glorfindel helping little Maeglin to understand court and being a prince is fun._

_Erestor...because Erestor is everywhere and special, if you read my other stories with him you'll understand. Mainly he's around Brethil because of the havoc that happened in Nargothrond and Turin while Tuor was roaming about before entering Gondolin. Best friend._


End file.
